Thanks to my slacking at not writing a post earlier in the day and to the demands for more Errand Girl, I give you guys Chapter 3!
Chapter 1 can be found here
Chapter 2 can be found here
I’m guessing by now you’re wondering what my “services” equal. If you guessed they have something to do with my body and an exchange of fluids and money…Get your damn head out of the gutter! I’m seventeen and quite virginal, thank you very much. My business cards, if I had any, would read:
Ellie Weston, Errand Girl of the Undead
It started out simple enough; pick up dry cleaning, do some banking, making runs to the local blood bank, etc. As word spread, more requests came in and it became quite the booming business.
How did I get started? It was kind of a trade-off so I could live the life I wanted. My guardian Josiah, the man who raised me from infancy, was a vampire. Not just any vampire but the head of the local brood, sire of many. I was home schooled mostly by Josiah and Siobhan, my Bean-Tighe–aka faerie– nanny and housekeeper, until I was twelve. Puberty hit and so did the urge to be a “normal” girl. I fought to experience school and sleepovers and boys, although I didn’t mention the boy bit too often as it was always met with bared fangs. It was quite the battle including tears, a refusal to eat and the whole deal of switching my life schedule to be up during the day and sleep at night, the complete opposite of what I knew growing up with a vampire for a father. Josiah finally relented so long as I agreed to take over his daytime errand running. He had a human retainer, Charles, who had done his bidding for years but was getting on in age. Josiah thought it would be kind to release Charles from his servitude allowing him to live out his golden years in peace and the lap of luxury. My guardian was very generous to those who “worked” for him. I jumped at the chance and have been running the errand business ever since.
Josiah was my most regular customer but several other vampires in the brood and a handful of down unders: demons, weres, fae, warlocks and the likes, have come to me for all sorts of reasons. Mundane tasks like watering their lawns while they’re out of town and picking up their mail, to gathering items for hex bags and helping them break curses.
As the jobs got potentially more dangerous Josiah insisted on upping my “training.” Since I was small I was taught several kinds of martial arts, some basic magic and spell casting not to mention a few of the dark arts. He knew that he couldn’t protect me during the daylight hours so he reassured himself by making sure I could handle my own. My classmates would be surprised to find I could kill them with a paperclip as easily as I could with a gun.
The summer was really busy work wise since I didn’t have school or homework to hold me back but things were always harder when classes started up again. I tended to miss class often but always kept my grades up so no one made much of a fuss. Thankfully.
My customers kept me rolling in brand names and all the books I could carry. My services were not cheap. The repeat business was booming, but then again, it was hard for most of them to find good help when a majority of the world had no idea of their existence.
It’s not a bad gig and kept life exciting. The only real negative, besides possibly getting on the bad side of some dangerous “people”, was that it was next to impossible to have any kind of social life when I had errands to run. Something Josiah probably knew going into the deal but neglected to tell me about. Hard to explain to friends that I couldn’t go to a movie because I had to collect grave dirt by the light of the three quarter moon or clip the hair off of someone’s yappy dog in order to make a voodoo doll. Not to mention the whole “Oh no, you can’t come to my house and meet my family. They might literally want you for dinner” thing.
Even though my life had its challenges, I wouldn’t change any of it. I enjoyed a more interesting childhood than most and knew a lot about the world, thanks to stories I dragged out of those who had lived for centuries. I’m allowed into a world most don’t know existed and I’m welcomed with open arms, by the majority anyway. Things kept me on my toes and I enjoyed the danger and the quiet mundane days equally. It wasn’t a bad life to lead.